I've wondered for a long time how dieting and diet culture effects children. Do kids pick up on their mother's eating habits? How damaging is it to demonize foods for our kids- even if we really, TRULY feel that things like donuts and cookies aren't healthy?
Turns out- all of my suspicions were correct.
A neurotic relationship with food so commonly begins with a parent (or parents) who are also neurotic around foods.
Here are just *some* of things that lots of parents do out of love for their child that might be potentially damaging down the road:
-Rewarding behavior or test scores with food
-Bartering for dessert based on how much of dinner is eaten
-Over-emphasizing how special going out to eat or having Fast Food is
-Commenting on our child's weight or size
-Feeding siblings differently based on natural body size
-Restricting certain foods or food groups
-Eliminating certain food or food groups
...just to name a few
Ultimately, this teaches that there is a morality and specific values associated with certain foods. This sets up children for a more complex relationship with food, which has been shown to then pave the way for disordered eating, clinical eating disorders, as well as body image issues.
Sure, on paper, none of this stuff sounds too detrimental, but I can promise you, it certainly can be.
Beat The Binge enrollment closes TOMORROW, 10/19/18
For more info and registration, click here.
For a long, long, long time- I called myself a weight loss coach. It was on every website, every tagline, and every business card that I had.
What a freakin' disservice!
Being a weight loss coach is simple. Get women to eat less calories than they're currently eating. BOOM. Magic. Even more magical would be calling it a cute name and tying it off with a bow.
Let me be clear that I am not anti-weight loss or anti-health. But tell women to stop focusing ONLY on weight loss? And they lose their damn minds. Tell women to let go of dieting forever? FORGET ABOUT IT.
Intuitive eating is gaining some popularity now. And people are either for it, or against it. If you're against intuitive eating? You just don't know what it entails yet. The women who are trying out intuitive eating and thinking it doesn't work? Aren't quite there yet.
Intuitive eating is quite literally engrained within us. We've been eating intuitively since the day we were born. The only reason we've lost the ability to eat intuitively is because of a fatphobic and diet-centric society that has taught us otherwise. Whether it's our parents' beliefs around food and weight, or our friends, or good ol' social media.
It's time to reconnect with yourself. This episode will shed some light on just a few of the misconceptions surrounding intuitive eating.
AND GUESS WHAT?!
I'm opening up a BRAND NEW small-group coaching group for 9 women who are sick of dieting all the damn time.
BEAT THE BINGE starts October 22nd and ends November 18.
The first 5 women to register save $99.
Registration ends Friday, October 19th unless spots fill before then.
You can read more about it here!
You know how the fitness industry has totally ruined exercise for most people? Like, if you don't want or will never have a 6-pack, what's the point, right? Or, if you're sick and tired of only exercising when you're trying to lose weight- what's the point, right?
Well, I hope this episode rekindles your love- or sparks the first ever fire under your butt to get you to exercise- specifically, strength training. There are countless benefits to exercise that have NOTHING to do with weight loss. And honestly? Any weight loss that comes with working out is just the cherry on top.
I am honored to have Rhonda on the show with us today! She works as a Personal Trainer in a very unique setting- inside of a Physical Therapy clinic and has worked with some amazing stories to share with us all. Besides Rhonda being a truly incredible fitness professional and truly helping people change their lives, she's also a dear friend of mine with a heart of gold.
In this episode, Rhonda tells us stories that can remind us all of the resiliency of the human spirit and the human body. I hope you tune in and soak it all up!
You can follow Rhonda on Facebook here and on Instagram here.
Questions? email me-
We've got a LOT to cover in this week's episode, ladies!
Make sure you tune in to get in on my latest social media "challenge", designed to put an end to the weight loss mind fuck- it's going to be GOOD!
After that, I talk a bit about how what we post on social media matters. In this day and age, social media- how we consume it and how we use it, is just an extension of our own manifestations. What you post matters, and HOW you post matters- and this has NOTHING to do with running a business online. It has everything to do with what kind of environment you're harnessing, and what kinds of things you're attracting into your consciousness. Serious stuff, ladies.
Whether we like it or not, social media is REAL. It plays a large part in our lives. This week's episode will inspire you (hopefully!) to change the way you're showing up. And I have a sneaking suspicion that it'll change the way you feel on the day to day.
This is a loaded episode!
email me: firstname.lastname@example.org
I used to approach vacation in one of two ways:
1) I would stuff my face for an entire week, waiting with baited breath to have to step on the scale once I was home and face the damage
2) I tiptoed around eating for the entire trip, nervous that I would undo all of my hard work. I counted points, calories, and stressed about whether or not I should have the local, homemade, seasonal cheesecake. Would it be worth the guilt and anxiety that it would cause?
When you're dieting, you're either on or off the proverbial bandwagon. But when you've found a way to navigate the middle- you can literally eat the same way year round- whether you're on vacation, whether it's your birthday, or whatever.
Life is so much better on this side of dieting.
Send me an email
I think most of us operate from victim mindset almost all of the time. There are different levels to it, and as I dive deeper into understanding how my victim mindset operates, I continue to learn how it holds many women back from living a life they can be truly obsessed about.
Playing the victim card feels really good. People pity us, nothing is our fault, and there's nothing we can do to change the situation. Playing the victim role allows us to point fingers at every thing and every one else.
As good as being the victim might feel- it also keeps us stuck.
Stepping out of the victim role and into responsibility is one of the biggest mindset shifts you can ever make in your life. Everything from your exercise, your nutrition, your body image, your job, and even your relationships- one of the biggest changes you can make is shifting your mindset out of this space.
Emily and I dive deeper into what victim mindset is, how it's holding us back, and what we can do about it.
Shoot me an email!
In this week's episode, I answer:
What's the best way to go about finding a trainer to hire or what gym to go to?
What's the best protein powder you should buy? Or should you even worry about protein supplements?
How can you enjoy cooking for yourself if you've never lived alone?
What autoimmune diseases do I have and how do they affect me?
Am I satisfied with where I am as a business owner and a coach?
How do you know if you're still participating in diet culture?
Got a question for me that you want answered on the podcast?
Shoot me an email!
We're all guilty of it.
We see someone on the internet, or at a reunion, or at the gym, and we notice that they've lost weight. We congratulate them, we ask them what they've been doing, we tell them they look great.
What's so bad about that?
When all we do is preoccupy ourselves with others' weight- whether that's weight loss or lack thereof, we continue to fulfill the narrative that it's the most important thing about us.
We fail to recognize that our weight is the least important thing about us. When we can't see that for other people, that means we can't see that in ourselves either.
What about the women who are lifting weights, eating well, and their body never shrinks into a societal standard? Is that not to be celebrated? Is that not to be recognized? Is that not good enough?
What if the woman you just complimented for her weight loss is miserable? What if she's malnourished, feeling obsessive over her calorie intake, and hasn't enjoyed herself in months because she's so scared she'll gain weight? Is that still worthy of praise?
The divide continues. Women who achieve weight loss get more praise for women who pursue strength. Women who deprive themselves are seen as dedicated, driven, and motivated whereas women who are less occupied with their size and scale are... ignored? Given a silent pat on the back?
It needs to stop.
And it can stop here.
8/14/18 is the LAST DAY to grab Body Confidence Bootcamp at a $100 discount!
You can read more about it here:
You can get your discount code here:
This episode is so special to me.
Back in 2013-ish, I almost threw in the towel. I didn't want to feed into the big machine that is "this industry" but I felt so lost. Is there really room for women to talk about getting stronger? Is there really room for women to train women to quit the insane dieting protocols and learn to take up space in the weight room?
A mentor of mine back then, Mark Crabtree, who has since passed away, turned me onto Nia Shanks. "You're going to want to follow her."
The rest is history.
Nia has been a lighthouse for me along my journey working in this industry so far. And I cannot wait to have you tune into this episode to talk about all things lifting heavy, eating well, and what it means to LIFT LIKE A GIRL.
Shoot me an email:
**discount code and link at the bottom!**
You've probably thought to yourself no less than 100 times: "my life would be full of more fun, better clothes, hotter sex, a better marriage, and more accolades if I could just lose these last 20 pounds AGAIN and for the last time!" Right?
If the thought of losing weight is THE THING you're holding onto that you believe will unlock all of life's secrets- this is the course for you.
If the thought of changing your body- whether that's a boob job, nose job, hair extensions, more makeup, new clothes, WHATEVER is THE THING you're banking on changing your life and how you feel about yourself? This is the course for you.
Here's a secret: your obsession with your distaste for yourself will never, ever go away no matter how many pounds you lose, no matter how long your hair is, no matter how many snacks you can eat off your boobs, no matter how expensive your yoga pants are, and no matter how many hours you've spent in the gym or gagging down kale smoothies. Otherwise, wouldn't you be in love with yourself by now? Seriously.
The best part is that I can teach you how.
I can teach you where your body image story came from and how to undo it.
I can teach you how to start rewriting your body image narrative right now.
All of us have not only the ability, but the right to feel empowered AF in our body RIGHT NOW- no matter what it looks like.
This is not an encouragement to "let yourself go" or an encouragement for you to remain sedentary and apathetic about your health for the rest of your life- actually, it's quite the opposite.
What could your life look like if you actually chose to eat well AND exercise regularly?
What if you did those things to serve yourself instead of only to try and shrink yourself?
What would your life feel like if you did those things without an external expectation?
WHAT IF- loving your body is the missing piece to your weight loss after all?
I'd be willing to venture a guess that yes- loving your body right now is the missing piece to everything in your life that seems to be missing. It's not the last 5-pounds, it's not more cardio, and it's sure as shit not more kale smoothies.
Click here to read more about the course:
Coupon code for $100 OFF of Body Confidence Bootcamp:
THECONFIDENCEPROJECT (all caps, no spaces!)
Expires August 14, 2018 at 11:59pm
I talked to a very close friend of mine (anonymous by request) about a few of her insecurities... NONE of them have anything to do about her weight or her body.
When I look at her? I see things that I wish I had.
She literally has perfect hair.
She can order clothes online and the size she orders not only fits, but it fits PERFECTLY.
She's kind. Like, you can just see how kind she is by looking at her face.
She has a robust social life.
So what in god's name does she have to feel insecure about?
And how could a girl like me (read: with cellulite, stretch marks, and depending on what position I'm sitting in- plenty-o'-fat-rolls) possibly help her?
In this episode, I recall a conversation I had with her. And how this very podcast, this very movement, is for EVERY BODY. <3
I don't say it enough, but thank you for listening and being a part of The Confidence Project with me!
I know you've done it- you buy every program under the sun thinking this will be it! This is THE THING you need to reach your goals.
Whether you're trying to lose weight, get strong, get lean AF, or even break into a business ownership role- you're in constant absorption mode where you just need another perspective, another product, another coach to be able to finally reach your goals!
So far, nothing has worked! You have every workout program you've ever purchased in your inbox. You have PDF's that outline exactly what you're supposed to be doing... so, to hell with this program and this coach, nothing is working!
Sorry, sister... in most cases the problem IS YOU.
I've been there. Every Monday I'd start a new diet, because the last one wasn't working fast enough. I was miserable, deprived, and so I just needed the next greatest thing to help me GET THERE.
I had every workout program under the sun- and no abs to show for it.
Turns out, I was the common denominator.
Once I got out of my own way, the path to success in all avenues of my life were perfectly clear. But, I can't say I see that in everyone. Most recently, women who were a part of my cohort in a business mentorship program are wondering why they wasted all of their time and money on such a long and expensive program- claiming it's a crock of shit and hasn't worked for them--- I'll leave this up to you to decide- was it the program? Or was it THEM?
Tune in to find out!
This was recorded in MAY! Which is so funny because I still haven't started reading our July Book Club Book "A Tribe Called Bliss" by Lori Harder. And, just by chance, this episode will be releasing when we're all reading it. GO FIGURE. But, this is such perfect timing.
I dive into it all.
What are your boundaries, why do they matter, and what do you do when you outgrow your relationships BECAUSE you've evolved?
The only people who are offended when you put up boundaries are those who benefited from you having NONE.
YOU GUYS!! This is the first time I've ever brought a *current* client of mine onto the show.
Tiffany and I started working together in October 2017- and I could not be more humbled to now be able to call this woman a friend of mine. (For reference, we recorded this on June 15, 2018.)
The icing on the cake is the transformation that Tiffany has experienced- mind, body, and soul- since we've been working together. She came to me while on the Keto diet and with a totally different brain inside her head! And now? Well...
I can't even take the credit- she's a total badass and is so damn coachable, she made my job easy.
Tune in to hear Tiffany's side of the story! <3
You can follow Tiffany on IG at: tiffstartsliving
Alyssa Love approaches weight loss in a way that I've never been able to articulate. She has such a contagiously beautiful soul, I cannot wait for you to tune into this one!
You can follow Alyssa on IG: iam_alyssalove
Don't forget- can hang out with us over on The Confidence Project Facebook group- see you there! <3
While I am a body positive coach- there are a few messages within the "body positivity" community that I don't necessarily agree with.
Is there a disconnect between your emotional and physical body?
Are you doing the things that make you feel the way you want to feel?
Although there is nothing inherently wrong with wanting to lose weight- it has to come from a place of radical self-love. What does that look like if we're not currently where we want to be?
It comes from making sure you're serving your highest self and not punishing your CURRENT self. Let me repeat that: SERVE YOUR HIGHEST SELF WHILE NOT PUNISHING YOUR CURRENT SELF.
Allow your body to take whatever shape it takes while living your best life.
Here is my take on what a body positivity journey looks like.
You start a new diet, you lose a ton of weight, everyone starts complimenting you and you get all of this new attention.
How can this possibly be bad?!
There is an unspoken dark side to dieting that no one ever talks about. In today's episode, Arielle Calerdon (IG: @ariellesays) dives in about the behind-the-scenes of a very public weight loss journey. What could possibly go wrong? Tune in to find out.
Don't forget, you can hang out with us over on The Confidence Project Facebook page here.
Just when I thought I had this whole "anti-dieting" thing figured out- it peeked it's ugly little head right back around the corner! But this time, in a very unconventional way. Tune in to see what I'm talking about!
I thought Jen Sincero changed my life when I read "You Are a Badass"
I thought she changed my life again when I read "You Are a Badass at Making Money"
Seeing Jen in person was SO LIFE CHANGING- I can't even put it into words.
It's no secret that I have a screwed up relationship with money- but aside from that, there's so much gold in this episode that I can't wait to share with you!
I used to call myself a weight loss coach. And now? Well, it's actually not even my priority to help you lose weight anymore.
You may have noticed that I've been posting all over social media that I'm pretty sick of weight loss and fat loss. I've had a few massive shifts in how I view my position as an authority and a coach in this industry that have been very hard to put into actual words- until recently. This episode dives deep into why I'm totally not interested in helping you lose weight.
Binge eating has NOTHING to do with food.
It has everything to do with HOW YOU THINK ABOUT THE FOOD.
Ready to F*ck Your Diet?
Join the email series here:
Don't hire me.
Don't hire anyone.
This is why this episode can cost me my job (sort of!)
There is so much you need to figure out and get a handle on before you start focusing on fat loss.
Have you heard about the F*ck Your Diet
email series? You can sign up here!
There's SO MUCH BS to sift through out there in the online space- ESPECIALLY when it comes to dieting.
One day, we're reading articles demonizing something and the next day, another click bait article comes out saying we need more of that one thing. It's maddening, isn't it!?
We have to skim the fat (no pun intended) and stick to the big rocks of what is actually important.
Something interesting happens when we focus on the big rocks- all of the noise fades away. We don't click on every.damn.thing. on the internet. We don't implement this new crazy idea that we think is the MISSING PEICE every time the wind blows. Doesn't that sound nice?? IT IS!
Break through the noise- focus on the big rocks.
I got your back, girlfriend.
Here's the biggest, darkest secret of weight loss: there is no secret.
The answer, in its most clinical form, is a math problem- and its right in front of our faces every day.
The truth is- you CAN eat anything that you want. No, not if you have a food allergy, this isn't about that. But guess what? I was my heaviest when I was dieting and eliminating foods from my diet. MY HEAVIEST.
Does it take some time and work and patience to fine-tune your newfound liberty around foods so that it can work for you? YES. But, you won't feel so crazy, you won't feel so anxious, and you won't be on a damn diet anymore white-knuckling your way to some proverbial happy ending that you've made up in your head.
You can eat anything you want and have the body you want- I promise.
Questions? Email me: email@example.com